Actor1 It is so surreal that it's empty

Actor2 If we get rid of all the lawyers then we dispense with litigation.

Actor3 That is not true If we kill all the flies the shit still remains.

Actor2 Do you know more people are killed on the roads in donegal than any other county.

Actor3 That's called natural selection.

Actor2 I saw some unsmoked streaky bacon in Dunnes Stores the other day, does that mean they have taken the smoke out of the bacon?

Actor3 You think that's bad, I was in Dunnes yesterday and they were selling smoked kippers!

Actor1 I lost my mobile phone what do you think I should do.

Actor3 Whats the number?

Actor1 086 230 2 231,

Actor2 We'll put an add in this shop window: mobile phone lost, call 086 230 2 231!

Actor4 I found this mobile phone cool isn't it?

Actor5 (Reads notice in shop window.) Call that number it may be theirs.

Actor4 (Calls the number.) It's engaged!

Idea! What about an opera of people singing a debate.